Fellowship of Punditry

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Cul Heath

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Rep. Mark B. Cohen

The Fellowship is accepting new members. Inquire within.

The Sages

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  • Into the Blogosphere
  • George Orwell

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    Political language -- and with variations this is true of all political parties, from Conservatives to Anarchists -- is designed to make lies sound truthful and murder respectable, and to give an appearance of solidity to pure wind.

    In a time of universal deceit - telling the truth is a revolutionary act.

    If you want a vision of the future, imagine a boot stamping on a human face - forever.

    But if thought corrupts language, language can also corrupt thought.

    Sometimes the first duty of intelligent men is the restatement of the obvious.

    Whatever is funny is subversive, every joke is ultimately a custard pie... a dirty joke is a sort of mental rebellion.

    In our age there is no such thing as 'keeping out of politics.' All issues are political issues, and politics itself is a mass of lies, evasions, folly, hatred and schizophrenia.

    All political thinking for years past has been vitiated in the same way. People can foresee the future only when it coincides with their own wishes, and the most grossly obvious facts can be ignored when they are unwelcome.

    At fifty everyone has the face he deserves.

    Most people get a fair amount of fun out of their lives, but on balance life is suffering, and only the very young or the very foolish imagine otherwise.

    John Stuart Mill

    Conservatives are not necessarily stupid, but most stupid people are conservatives.

    The amount of eccentricity in a society has generally been proportional to the amount of genius, mental vigor, and moral courage it contained. That so few now dare to be eccentric marks the chief danger of the time.

    The general tendency of things throughout the world is to render mediocrity the ascendant power among mankind.

    Whatever crushes individuality is despotism, by whatever name it may be called and whether it professes to be enforcing the will of God or the injunctions of men.

    A man who has nothing for which he is willing to fight, nothing which is more important than his own personal safety, is a miserable creature and has no chance of being free unless made and kept so by the exertions of better men than himself.

    Mark Twain

    Don't let schooling interfere with your education.

    All generalizations are false, including this one.

    A classic is something that everybody wants to have read and nobody wants to read.

    Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please.

    Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.

    The Public is merely a multiplied "me."

    Only kings, presidents, editors, and people with tapeworms have the right to use the editorial "we."

    Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect.

    Only one thing is impossible for God: To find any sense in any copyright law on the planet.

    Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.

    Winston Churchill

    The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter.

    I like pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals.

    Don't talk to me about naval tradition. It's nothing but rum, sodomy and the lash.

    Never hold discussions with the monkey when the organ grinder is in the room.

    Criticism may not be agreeable, but it is necessary. It fulfils the same function as pain in the human body. It calls attention to an unhealthy state of things.

    However beautiful the strategy, you should occasionally look at the results.

    In war as in life, it is often necessary when some cherished scheme has failed, to take up the best alternative open, and if so, it is folly not to work for it with all your might.

    Otto Von Bismarck

    When you want to fool the world, tell the truth.

    I have seen three emperors in their nakedness, and the sight was not inspiring.

    Never believe anything in politics until it has been officially denied.

    Be polite; write diplomatically ;even in a declaration of war one observes the rules of politeness.

    Voltaire

    A witty saying proves nothing.

    If God created us in his own image, we have more than reciprocated.

    When he to whom one speaks does not understand, and he who speaks himself does not understand, that is metaphysics.

    I have never made but one prayer to God, a very short one: "O Lord make my enemies ridiculous." And God granted it.

    To succeed in the world it is not enough to be stupid, you must also be well-mannered.

    Doubt is not a pleasant condition, but certainty is absurd.

    It is forbidden to kill; therefore all murderers are punished unless they kill in large numbers and to the sound of trumpets.

    The best way to be boring is to leave nothing out.

    Karl Marx

    Philosophy stands in the same relation to the study of the actual world as masturbation to sexual love.

    All I know is I'm not a Marxist.

    The writer may very well serve a movement of history as its mouthpiece, but he cannot of course create it.

    Monday, October 18, 2004

    Lions led by Donkeys

    By Mary Desmond

    Which cannon? Those cannon over there sir. The young officer waived his arm over his head and instead of pointing to the retreating cannon disappearing over the hill the Colonel of the light brigade charged into a valley directly into artillery primed to fire. So they say. But the young officer had also written a text book of military strategy pointing out that light calvary could be used as shock troops to take out enemy cannon positions if followed close on by heavy cavalry support. The problem then as now is shenanigans. The heavy cavalry did not follow on because their General's daughter had been besmirched by the Light Brigade's Colonel. Today the six hundred from the Black Watch

    An English Prime Minister is sending the first battalion of the Black Watch to show that the Scots will bleed and die, and your president can boast of a real coalition of the willing, rebutt Kerry's taunt that it is americans who are doing 90% of the work while the allies sunbathe. And in the House today the politicans lied. So don't talk to me about talking sense. Men will die. I'll talk how i please.

    They were formed as peacekeepers in the 18th Century. Today they give out sweets, water, cards and pencils to children in Basra. American troops try to do that but as they alternate with attack helicopters and zero tolerance, their rules of engagement requiring them to shoot to kill iraqis who loot copper wire for example (a dollar a metre) so they can feed their families, not to mention the Geneva convention, it doesn't come across as very sincere. There are other regiments there. The blues and royals, but they are English gentlemen, the Queen's own lifeguards. No greater love hath any english prime minister than to lay down the lives of 600 Scots for his Bush. They go from being peace keepers to warriors under american command, reaping what the americans have sown.

    The Light Brigade took the Cannon. Their Colonel during the trot phase of the charge, had to place his drawn sabre across the chest of the officer to his right to prevent him from charging ahead. it doesn't matter that they took the cannon and the theory was sound. It was the last battle where honour rather than victory was important.

    So too in this war where victory has no meaning. The purpose is to maintain a state of fear in the american populace. So these men of Perth will spell the word honour for the world in their blood. it doesn't matter if the americans level Falujah, it doesn't matter who wins your election. This is about human sacrifice, men of honour must die that we cowards can continue to live in fear.

    The Black Watch won't mutiny because they don't have the right equipment or their orders are stupid or their superiors can't find their arses with the light on. They knew when they went out there that if they couldn't get army flak jackets or desert boots that didn't melt in the heat they had to purchase their own and many did. They have taken the Queen's shilling. They have been sent to die for your President's election campaign. They are soldiers. They understand duty.

    We will all die. Some will be knocked down by a careless driver. Some will choke on a chicken bone. The regiment kept the peace in the highlands. Once that meant murdering the clan chiefs of the McDonalds. God has given them the chance to regain their honour if it entertains the american electorate and helps re-elects Bush, that won't matter either. Whatever happens now the Black Watch have entered into mythic consciousness. I leave the French to conjure their bon mots, as the merovingian puts it, it's like wiping your Rs with silk. God Save Queen Elizabeth the First of the United Kingdom and the Second of England

    posted by Mary Desmond at 10/18/2004 05:03:00 PM |

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